The doctor said to stand up and walk. It wasn't nearly as dramatic as the time Jesus told a guy to "take up his mat and walk" but no one quite has Jesus' flair!
After six and a half weeks of using crutches to move around worried about losing my balance, I am now a quite bit more mobile. I was able to feed the animals, make coffee this morning and pull something out of the freezer for dinner tonight. I never thought I would enjoy being able to do the simple chores!!
Honestly, being able to do the simple chores gives me a feeling of deep gratitude. (A bonus is Kendra having my burden lifted off of her for which she is very grateful!) The truth for all of us is that we do not appreciate what we have until we lose it. I never appreciated just how incredible the art of walking is until I was forced out of walking and now, after a long period of time, have to learn to walk all over again.
So in the first hours of ambulation without crutches I have had to relearn the importance of balance. I know the neighbors were laughing at me yesterday at the mailbox when I almost fell over stepping up the curb. I caught my balance by flapping my arms like a bird to keep from falling! There is a intentional slowness to my life right now as I recalibrate my inner balance.
I went to bed pretty early last night as well. Walking was exhausting!! I did not know just how quickly muscles and joints lock up when you do not use them. I had parts of my foot and ankle that made a very memorable introduction of themselves to me in the last few hours!!! Yeowch!
All of which leads me to a very core conclusion: the process of recovery is long, slow, and sometimes painful. There is a lengthy bit of relearning balance and the strengthening of muscles one had not realized were there. It requires an intentional slowness as a recalibration occurs at the core of one's being. It can be exhausting but there is always gratitude at the progress made which is expressed in everyday, ordinary ways.
The doctor said to stand up and walk. Well, I did. And thanks be to God that He is giving me a new sense of balance and an opportunity to flex my physical (and spiritual) muscles. I am pretty grateful today for my ongoing recovery and know that God is in the midst of it all. I can hear echoes of the voice lovingly calling me to "take up my mat and walk...."
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